If you feel like we don’t know each other the way we used to, you’re not imagining it.
According to a recent article in the The Atlantic entitled “The Anti-Social Century,” Americans are spending more time alone than ever before.
And the readers who responded in the comments section didn’t just agree—they sounded genuinely worried.
We’ve built lives that make solitude easy and community harder than it should be.
One reader summed it up.
“We are better off cultivating relationships offline, and yet we all still spend so much time online,” they wrote.
It’s true. We crave connection, but convenience keeps getting in the way. It’s easier to stay home, scroll through updates or send a quick text than to walk down the street and knock on a door.
But the cost of that convenience is real.
When we stop showing up for one another, something essential slips away.
Another comment described life after Hurricane Helene, when phone towers went down and people had to depend on neighbors again.
“Without technology, everyone went outside,” the reader wrote. “We cared for one another.” Imagine that—real conversation and cooperation, brought about not by comfort, but by crisis.
We shouldn’t need a disaster to remind us what community feels like. The good news is, we can start rebuilding it right where we live.
While Derek Thompson’s article is well-worth your time, his work, coupled with the comments from readers, offers a few simple suggestions we can use to build community and be less lonely:
We should reclaim our shared spaces.
Town squares, parks, libraries, churches and coffee shops are the “commons” that keep a community alive.
When the city hosts a festival or the library holds a reading event, showing up matters. Every handshake and smile helps keep the local fabric strong.
There is no shortage of these opportunities right here in Western Grayson County. Seek them out and get involved.
We can build connection into our routines.
Join a civic club, volunteer at the food pantry or attend a school concert.
Even if your kids are grown, the community building benefits of attending school events abound.
In a world with fewer and fewer civic organizations, buck the trend. Find somewhere to get involved. You may find that we get out of life what we put into it.
Community doesn’t happen by accident, it grows when people make time for it.
One reader said it best, “Loneliness is the price we pay for convenience, but connection is built through inconvenience.”
Encourage workplaces and schools to value togetherness as much as productivity.
When everything happens online or from home, we lose the little moments that build trust.
A quick chat in the hallway, a shared laugh and a helping hand all go a long way to build community.
You never know what someone is truly going through. Taking the time to check-in can be life changing.
Use technology more thoughtfully.
A Facebook post isn’t a substitute for a front porch conversation. Use your phone to organize a neighborhood get-together, not to avoid one.
Start small.
Say hello to a neighbor you haven’t met. Sit beside someone new at church.
Check in on an older person who lives alone. These small gestures add up.
Look for the “commons” in everyday life.
The “commons” isn’t something government builds. It’s something we create— day in and day out— by showing up for one another.
One reader concluded, “I think of how wonderful my life could have been if I had dared to move outside my comfort zone sooner.”
That’s a lesson we should all take to heart.
If we want a stronger, happier community, the first step is simple: step outside, look around and start saying “hello” again.