When I sit down to write each month I try to write about something relevant to my life or the lives of those around me. I try to come up with something that I believe will help not only the people in my life but also the people of my community. In thinking of the first four months of the year, unfortunately, the emotion that I’ve felt most prevalent has been grief.
We are only in April and I’ve already been to two funerals, which is more than I think I’ve been to in the last two years combined. Even though I grew up in a family that owns a funeral home, I always find myself struggling to deal with the raw emotions that so many people show in those moments.
Watching a person grapple with the reality of the fact that a person that they loved with their whole heart is gone and is never coming home is just gut wrenching to me. To watch a friend’s wife and kids or my mom and grandma struggle like that and know that nothing I can do or say is going to fill the hole left in their hearts and lives is so difficult for me that I seem to find myself not saying anything at the time.
In January, after the unexpected death of my friend Stacy, I was given the honor of speaking at his funeral. Having never done anything like that before, I worried about what I might say and how I could help his family through that difficult time. After much prayer and seeking out help from someone with more experience, God put the following words on my heart to speak to that family and I feel that they will go well here too:
As humans, we don’t know or understand why God puts us through the trials and tribulations of this life. But we do know one thing is certain, God has a plan for each and every one of us. He knows the things we’ll go through before we ever do. Matthew 11:28-30 says “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your weary souls. My yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
We must stand firm in our faith in Jesus and know that even when we don’t feel it in this world, He loves us and will provide for us. If you don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, there is no better time than now to start one. He already knows you and loves you as you are. He already knows what you are going through and is waiting on you. We need only to surrender ourselves to Him and allow Him to be our guiding light in this life. Cast your pain and struggles at His feet and allow Him to fill the void that has formed in your heart. Give your fear, worries, and doubt to Him and He will give you peace.
As we move forward and try to adjust to life without our significant other, relative or friend, the coming days, weeks, months and years will be difficult. There will be days of sorrow, sadness and anger. Cling to Jesus and He will remind you that there will also be days of great joy. No matter how difficult that may be to believe right now. There is great joy in the memories that we created in our time with them. Remember those. Share them with those around you. Doing so will not only keep their great legacy alive but will also help us find peace in their absence.
I read once that “Grief is the price we pay for Love” and if that is the case, as it seems to be, then it is worth every penny. Grief is an emotion that can affect a person so much. It can grip your life and prevent you from seeing the good still left in the world. If you are struggling with the loss of a loved one and need help seeing the light again, please ask for help. Find someone to talk to that will listen and help you be able to laugh and smile again. There are so many people who have been through what you are going through. All you have to do is look and you will find that you are not alone.
Source: Vecteezy.com